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Relational Policy 2023-24

Stoke Primary School

Relational Policy 2023-24



Stoke Primary School

Relational Policy



Date Reviewed by   Governors:Autumn 2023
Reviewed by :    Lucy Pater (DHT, Inclusion Lead)
Date of next review:    Autumn 2024
Support Documents included :

Teaching and Learning Policy

Mental Health Policy




At Stoke Primary School we believe that effective learning systems, strong relationships and restorative practice are integral to our culture of positive behaviour choices. The approach we take to our curriculum learning and the way pastoral development integrates with academic learning enables each and every child to reach their full potential.


Engaging good quality learning adapted to meet the needs of the individual children is key to all aspects of this policy. Teachers have the freedom to support the delivery of this through our embracing of individual teaching styles and personalities. Freedoms given in wider policies ensure the most appropriate and bespoke approaches.


Our policy is based on the belief that:


  • Good relationships and a strong rapport with children in school enable stronger understanding of the value of good behaviour.
  • School is a safe place for children where they will be listened to, challenges discussed openly and solutions are found.
  • Staff have a collective responsibility to support all our children and that as a team we are more likely to create solutions and strategies that are effective.
  • When things go wrong children are an integral part of establishing a solution, so they are able to learn from the situation.
  • Children should see the effects of their behaviour as consequences and develop an intrinsic desire to be the best they can be. We refer to the terms incentive and consequence to support children’s ability to make good choices.
  • Where children have displayed unacceptable behaviour, restorative work is a valuable part of the learning experience.
  • Children’s needs and understanding are taken into considerations when determining appropriate consequences.
  • All behaviour is a form of communication and that it is the collaborative role of staff, parents and children to unpick underlying needs, appropriate consequences and systems to ensure children behave appropriately whilst having the means to communicate effectively.




  • To ensure learning systems enable each and every child to understand how they can be successful as a member of the school community and as a learner.
  • For Quality First Teaching in a broad and balanced curriculum to underpin growth in each and every child.
  • To consistently and fairly implement incentive and consequence systems that take into account children’s individual needs.
  • To know children well enough to plan appropriate provision that allows all children to succeed and prevents incidents of negative behaviour.
  • To adopt a ‘plan and prevent’ system rather than a ‘find and fix’ one with regards to children’s behaviour.
  • To encourage school/parental partnership, to promote children’s education and maintain standards of behaviour.



The Role of the Teacher


Teachers and support staff are integral to behaviour success through high quality teaching and learning that is carefully planned to meet the needs of all children.


Teachers need to establish consistent levels of acceptable behaviour with the support of parents, governors and school leadership.  Positive expectations, praise, incentives, rewards and good relationships are the key to successful classroom management.  Pupils need to know how to make good choices.  They need to receive consistent positive encouragement as means of motivation.  They need to be taught to manage their own behaviour and understand how to appropriately communicate frustrations, anger or disappointment.


Teachers need to recognise that effective conditions for learning: (planning, pitch, pace, participation) will impact positively on general classroom behaviour. Staff must be aware of individual trigger points for children and plan to prevent potential unwanted behaviours.

Staff will ensure that appropriate restoration is carried out following incidents of unwanted behaviour and that such episodes are reflected on as learning experiences upon which to build.



School rules are kept to an essential minimum.  They have been developed to be meaningful to children.  None are too difficult.  They are all designed to develop courtesy, good manners and mutual respect.  They are to protect children from injury, to care for equipment and to maintain a hygienic, healthy environment.


Anti-social behaviour is not condoned.  It is essential that parents and teachers work together through discussion and action on any problems which develop.


These basic rules are simplified and displayed in all classrooms and corridors and children are reminded of them regularly.


Alongside this, are the STOKE values. Children are encouraged to reflect on these values considering whether they have indeed been:

Solution focused






Mental Health Awareness

Stoke Primary School recognises the importance of supporting and developing positive Mental Health.  Teams of staff have been trained in both Youth Mental Health First Aid and Mental Health First Aid. 


We understand that behaviour management can adversely affect mental health.  Key to our approach is inclusive understanding and analysis of behaviour so that all stakeholders are involved and fully aware of what has happened and what the likely consequences could be.


We consider that open and transparent dialogue allows difficult conversations to take place and that this honesty enables all parties to manage the situation with respect to their own mental health.


Behaviour Guidelines


Incentives and Rewards

It is very important that praise and reward should be meaningful to children.  Children will achieve more, be better motivated and behave better, when staff praise and reward their successes rather than focus on their failure.


Smileys are used to recognise achievement.  Once a child has received 10 Smileys they exchange them for a House token which adds to the House Points collected across school.


Smileys are given for

  • Good work (effort, progress, achievement)
  • Good attitude to their learning
  • Demonstrating STOKE values (solution focussed, truthful, optimistic, kind, empathetic)
  • Exhibiting our Learning Qualities (challenging yourself, persevering, focusing, exploring, reflecting)


Stickers are used by staff across school to celebrate success.  These are through individual systems established by class teachers.


Certificates recognising children’s use of STOKE values and the Learning Qualities are awarded in Friday celebration assemblies and are sent home.


Experiences are used as further incentives for class or other groups.


Approaches to deal with poor behaviour


Supporting Individual Pupils with Behavioural Difficulties


Where children in school have existing SEND identified they are usually working with a series of bespoke targets.  Where a behaviour issue needs addressing, their SEND systems will be taken into account in terms of the approaches to resolution and the implementation of consequences where appropriate and has meaning to the child.


Consequences for low level behaviour concern


Where behaviour is considered a low-level issue the use of consequences can be applied.  Pupils will always be listened to as we seek to understand the reason for any behaviour and through discussion, we will apply a consequence if appropriate.  We aim for children to learn through this process to enable them to make better choices.


Children are given up to three non-verbal / verbal reminders to correct their behaviour. If they have still not amended their behaviour then the following consequences may occur.


  • Lost time from playtimes / lunchtimes
  • sitting separately in class
  • spending time in parallel class group
  • this may be escalated to time spent with a Senior Leader.


Consequences for high level behaviour concern


Where a child’s behaviour is considered a high-level concern, Stoke Primary School has a range of systems to support the required improvement.


Through detailed investigation consequences are discussed with all stakeholders to ensure that the planned action is in line with the behaviour issue.  Consequences are therefore tailored to the situation and individual child, but the process follows these principles


  • Always include children in the discussions of behaviour and consequence so they are able to learn from the situation
  • Provide clarity and consistency of suitable responses
  • Minimise disruption to others especially teaching and learning time
  • Provide every opportunity for children to correct their own behaviour, make sensible choices and prevent further consequences being applied
  • Allow early involvement of parents, line managers, SENCO and support agencies
  • Do everything reasonably possible to avoid exclusion from school


Where injury has occurred


  • If behaviour results in physical or verbal abuse towards a teacher/adult an ‘Assault’ form should be completed and a copy forwarded to the LA.
  • If physical intervention of any kind is required, then a record should be completed in the ‘Bound and Numbered’ Book as soon as possible and within 24 hours of the incident.
  • Any other incident deemed ‘serious’ or resulting in injury should be recorded on an Accident/Assault Incident form, the teacher’s class diary or the Playgrounds Incident Book.
  • Incidents of bullying and/or racism should be recorded and logged in the relevant Record Log


Note   See also our policy on the ‘Physical intervention Guidance (Team Teach)”.



This is a sanction that will only be used if there is:

  • A serious breach of the school’s behaviour expectations.
  • The pupil continually behaves badly and fails to respect the school rules.
  • If allowing the pupil to remain in school would seriously inhibit the education of other children.


Head Teacher’s role in exclusion

The Head Teacher will:

  • Act as lead officer and carry out an investigation to determine most appropriate course of action.
  • Discuss with the pupil what has happened and why it is of serious concern.
  • Discuss the events that surround the incident with wider staff
  • Consider all the facts presented.


Length of Exclusions

The Head Teacher has the right to exclude pupils for a period from 1 to 5 school days BUT each case will be assessed and treated individually and a sanction applied depending on the incidents severity.


Permanent Exclusion

This decision is a serious one. It will be the final step, the last resort in a process of support for dealing will disciplinary problems. It will also be a decision that will be made by the Governing Body and not just the Head Teacher. There may, however, be an occasion where the Head Teacher could decide to permanently exclude a pupil for the first breach of rules. This may include:

  • Serious actual, or threatened violence against another pupil or member of staff
  • Sexual abuse or assault
  • Drug offences
  • Carrying an offensive weapon


Notifying Relevant Parties of an Exclusion

On excluding a pupil, the Head Teacher must immediately notify parents of the exclusion and the reason for it. They must also inform parents of their rights to make representations to the Governing Board. The Governing Board must also be notified of certain exclusions.


The Governing Board Responsibilities in relation to Exclusion

For fixed-period exclusions of more than five days the governing body must arrange suitable alternative full-time education, which must begin no later than the sixth day of the exclusion. For permanent exclusions, the pupil’s ‘home’ local authority must provide alternative education.


Governing board are legally required to consider parents' representations about an exclusion, and in some cases must also consider whether an excluded pupil should be reinstated. If parents disagree with the decision not to reinstate their child, they can request that it be considered by an independent review panel.


Searching, Screening and Confiscation

Where necessary, searching, screening and confiscation will be used to safeguard a child/children at Stoke Primary School. Stoke Primary School adheres to ‘Searching, Screening and Confiscation: Advice for Schools (May 2018).


Supporting documentation

  • Anti Bullying Policy
  • Attendance Policy
  • Inclusion Policy
  • Feedback Policy
  • Physical Intervention Policy (Team Teach)
  • Preventing Extremism and Radicalisation Guidance
  • DfE Searching, Screening and Confiscation: Advice for Schools
  • Home School Agreement



An example of steps taken to support children to change their behaviour :

Non verbal reminder


Verbal reminder to think about choices


Second verbal reminder to: make a change/ do something differently


Appropriate consequence:

Time out / time in

Minutes off playtime to reflect / complete missed learning


Time with SLT to reflect on choices


Parents may be contacted


Restoration following reflection about what could be done differently next time.



Research to support policy approach


(Education Endowment Foundation 2019)

Practice at Stoke Primary School is linked to the research document below and all 6 areas are woven throughout daily interactions and policy.